One of my flatmates just knocked on my door and held up a Chinese to English pocket translator and asked me if i had a "Screwdriver" and pointed to the screen. I said no even though I had one. Just kidding, i dont have one.

I just was doing some research on this composer I like and ran across this: Nederlands Blazers Ensemble Change it to English or leave it in whatever language it may be in and click to listen to the sample "Papas- Beat the Retreat" Whoever the @#$@# Steve Martland is, he's a genius!!!! I can't wait to learn more about him.

Also started working on my "white project" at school. Please direct all inquiries to : todd.baxter@gmail.com

HAVE A NICE HALLOWEEN!!

captions

Today i went running but i dont have any shorts except boxer type shorts that i wear when i'm goign to sleep.. so i wore those out running with a sweatshirt.. when i was out, i saw a sign that said 2 for 1 ear wax removal kits.. so i stopped.. it was a chinese herbal store.. miki and i had talked about how we wanted to empty our heads so i wanted to get them. .. i got themm. while i was there, the chinese man was telling me about how england has famer things like big ben and buckingham fountain. i was lookign down and i realized i was in a chinese herbal store in boxer shorts buying ear wax kit from a man who couldn't pronounce "famous".

Monday through Thursday our class learned how to sew. On Friday, we made an arm out of fabric. Friday night I went over to Miki’s so we could go out to meet her friend Andrew and some of his friends. The tube was broken at Camberwell Green so we had to take a bus to another tube station that was broken. Mostly, everybody was plastered by 10:30, including a lot of older men whose tolerances should be way higher. In London, you can walk around with open booze, and people do. My favorite people on the bus going there were two ladies with tight black clothing on. Where you guys going? In unison, “Breckington Ridge” or something similar. Me: is that a club or something. No, it’s a bus station. Then they ran off with gusto.

The bar was off the tube station. You don’t even have to go out of the station to get to it. It’s like a small hole in the wall that you kind of have to know where it is underground. You walk along a couple of long hallways that are lit dramatically. At one point, it was really dark and Miki was pretending to say “hello darling” and somebody passed by and thought she was talking to them and said hello. It smelled like old attic in there and the busy part was ½ crowded, but nice. It was likea cave and a subway station mixed. We had a weird beer on ice that was alright. Andrew and his friends were nice. I mostly talked to Rachel except she is from Liverpool and I could barely understand her because of her thick accent so I had to ask her to repeat everything a zillion times. Towards the end, she was mega-hammered and started telling me to change majors. She is coming to my concert on December 9th, as is the rest of London. We stayed there till 2:30 and then caught a bus back to Miki’s place. There was a man on the bus who was talking to himself and laughing. He made me happy until he started laughing harder, which ultimately revealed he was missing a good chunk of his teeth. He later stood up and waited for the bus door to open. A Chinese man in hospital scrubs was pretending to be asleep while still being aware that a man 3 inches from his face was about to almost kill him / laugh with no teeth. Toothless laughed and then held out his hand to give seated Chinese man / stranger to toothless a handshake. Miraculously, the sleeping Chinaman shook his hand even though he was “sleeping”. When Miki and I got off, I tried to shake his hand but he just smiled in a sleepy daze. This could be because he thought I was making fun of toothless and thought I was being funny or it could be because Chinaman was also delirious. We got food on the way back but then realized our favorite kabob place was still open and should have eaten there instead.

We woke up and went to British Library. It is ridiculously awesome there. We figured it was a regular library, but we were wrong. You walk in and it is huge, spotless, and modern in a not annoying way. We asked where we could get our library cards and were pointed to this oversized waiting room where there were people on computers applying and tons of desks with cameras all set up. A lot of confusion came up when we asked dhow to check out books, as they don’t lend out books, it’s all reference!! She sort started speaking loudly at us and telling us that we need to be researching something and then we said we were and then she said that “BUT YOU SAID YOU JUST WANTED TO CHECK OUT BOOKS AND LOOK AROUND”. So we convinced her of our seriousness, and she showed us some computers where we had to fill out forms online. Then we got “interviewed”, they took our pictures, and gave us cards. It was like getting into a morgue or a FBI zone. I got a Key facts print out and Miki got other information. ; You can't take in coats bags, pens, ect. so we had to check all that shit in a special coatcheck area over by the cafe. To get into the reading rooms, you have to show your cards and order the books on special computers. They are then brought up to you and delivered to your table that you read at. It is like that wine bar in Las Vegas where the lady dangles on a rope and gets wine bottles off a 100-foot tall case at Mandalay Bay. Miki was sort of disappointed and confused about the lack of books there then I explained that they go get books from the basement. She was then happy. We looked at maps in the maps room. Everything was authentic, ancient, and required dry hands. I love it there.

We went to look for another library in the area but it was child’s play. I searched force fields, which returned no results. I also searched kittens and that returned no results even though I could see a bookrack in the back of the room that read “pets”. How they had a pet section with no books on cats is beyond me. We parted ways. She went to a Japanese part of the city and I went to get a chicken sandwich from Burger King. They were out of regular bread, so they had to put it on a hot dog bun. I did my laundry for the second time and then went back over to Miki’s place for Authentic Chinese food prepared by her roommates. There were about 8 people there. The food was amazing, even if it wasn’t served on a hot dog bun. Miki told me a story about how she found an old diary or notepad that we wrote in during a sample sale in LA. In it was the phrase “wedlock dreadlock.” She said it had something to do with Whoppi Goldberg having a baby with Ted Danson. I forgot, but it’s important, so I’ll figure out what she meant.

4 Anne.

Tuesday collage

Thursday we had a fire drill at school.

Friday we had a fire at school. It seemed weird when we were being rushed out off the second floor for the second day in a row. It started to take a while for the 2nd "fire drill" to end when rumors started swirling that it was an actual fire. They told us to come back at 2pm. I went with two of my classmates to the Tate Modern to go down the slides that were recently installed by some artist who does that sort of thing all the time. We waited in line for a while and then realized we didn't have free tickets, so we mostly just wandered around after that. Betsy wanted to do some research for our white project so we gave strangers some paper with the word "lovers" written on it with a pencil. Some people had good reactions to the word, some people had bad answers, some people refused to answer. It was mostly us laughing and chasing around people and picking people out of the crown to turn into our victims. We headed back later via the Millenium Bridge. Zoe's feet hurt so she made some shoes out of paper so she didn't have to walk barefoot.So we were walking towards the bridge but there was a gigantic puddle. Zoe didn't want to get the paper shoes wet so she started to walk around it while Betsy and I kind of splashed through it. Betsy, "Hey, Mr., what is this stuff?" Official looking guy, "Sewage!" Apparently London sewage is similar to Crystal Pepsi. We got back to class late and everything was canceled i think because the floor was too unstable. They only let people in one at a time to get their bags from the 2nd floor. I tip toed as to not fall through the floor. That nite i went to dinnner with a friend and missed Betsy's get-togethher by a few hours.

Saturday, I met Miki by her house. She was on the internet when i arrived. We each got a table down the street from her at a thrift store. I really wanted one in particular but wanted to shop around. By the time we got back, the good one was gone so I had to get another one. She took her side table home and helped me get on the tube with mine. Mine is big as I need a big one since my burnt buidling hours are basically from sun up to sun down weekdays. A tube guy gave us a hard time about having the table start on fire in the subway so i lied and said we got permission from somebody else ahead of time. He let us one with reluctance. We lugged it to Oval where miki bought two necklaces at a church that were shipped here from Africa for 3 pounds each. There were three black ladies and white gengleman there. We dropped my table off and took the bus to the Catford Commet Electonicals place where she got a printer, camera, ink, speakers, and a memory card. The trainee that helped us there had bad breath. I got new headphones and an extension cord. Miki got hungry so we went into a Caribean food place. She shopped the menu and came up with a reasonable selection. She articulated the answer to the woman behind the counter. She said, "we're out of that." Then miki chose something else. They were out of that too. Miki asked them what they did have and the lady said "We're out of everything". But somehow there were people in there doign things, but i guess none of them were eating. Oh, I think they had bread. We ended up getting food from a guy in a van. It was jerk chicken but tasted awful. The rice was good. She had some sort of pouch that looked like a yellow napkin folded in half.

We got back to her place and set up some of her stuff and rememberd when we passed the guy in another restaurant that smiled at us. He was good! Also, the bike shop where i am gonna get a bike. Also, the term "saw horse" doens't work over here. Unfortunately, I've already forgotten the UK version.




Oh, I forgot that on the way back from Commet, I wanted to go to a ping pong club. I've been excited for the 3-8 meeting for a week. The place we ended up at had a sign on the froot stoop that read "ghetto tennis". There were thugs all around but i think they just finished up playing regular tennis. We walked through a bunch of weeds, around some signs that said "art room" and "converence room b" and ended up finding Michael. He greeted us in the doorway of an old abandoned schoolroom. He was covered in sweat. He had me fill out paperwork that required my race to be disclosed and a circle : rent / own. Also, would i consider being on a committee? of course i would!! i borrowed a racket and played Eric who is about 75 and could serve really fast. we volleyed for a while then, as i am highly compeditive for some reason, suggested a game. I beat him 12 to 10 in overtime. there really wasn't an "overtime" but we were playing to 11. I had to beat him by two. I am definately going again to see the gang. I also want to start playing darts.

Today is Wednesday. Things have gotten busier at school. We had our presentation that we had to work on for a week. It was on the 60's and how the political, economical, and cultural happenings affected the frock of this time. We presented, as did all the other groups. The teacher said things like "nice" and "well done!" to each group. It felt like 3rd grade.

We started patternmaking (Cutting) as well. It is intense and fast and good. The teacher is great. When he spelled his name today I could have sworn he said F R U COMMA O U D.. but it's just Froud. We dont have lockers yet so i have to lug my papers, books, utensils and things to and from everyday. That alone exhausts me.

Yesterday I went to North London Wind Ensemble. It was pretty awful. I played Eb as i should and did some damage. We mostly played really hard things that sounded liek garbage. A lady in a van picked me up from the tube station who would later go on to play oboe. She ahd to call her daughter at 1/2 time to remind her to do her math homework. I borrowed her stand. I will probably never see her again.

Today I went to check out Croydon Syphonic Band. They're much better. I played Eb on all songs and had solos in the upper register, mostly in The 3 Bears Suite. They mostly were sightreading. I was playing the wrong music on one song.. The Bb clarinet part and the conductor kept freaking out and i said Im playing what's written and then it turns out ti was the wrong music. Everyone laughed until their sides hurt. The only person's names i remember is David, the conductor and Paula, the clarinet palyer who sat next to me who is a librarian and has teeth that look like a rainbow. I liked everybody there and talked to a lot of people but nobody was goign by the train station on the way home so i had to take a bus.. Going there, i took bus, subway, walked, to train, then bus then walked. Same on way homme except in reverse. It takes about 1 hour and 20 minutes each way and I think I will go back.

I also got a phone but haven't used it. I think i put christine's (van driving oboe player) name in it.. I think i might have to go erase her now.

Dinah-moe-hum lyrics by F. Zappa

I couldnt say where shes coming from,
But I just met a lady named dinah-moe humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you cant make me cum
(yjes cant do it)

She made a bet with her sister whos a little dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I dont mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(so I got down to it)

I whipped off her bloomersn stiffened my thumb
An applied rotation on her sugar plum

I pokedn stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didnt hear no dinah-moe humm,
Dinah-moe humm

Dinah-moe humm
Dinah-moe humm
Where this dinah-moe
Comin from
Done spent three hours
An I aint got a crumb
From the dinah-moe, dinah-moe, dinah-moe
From the dinah-moe humm

I got a spot that gets me hot
But you aint been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you aint been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you aint been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
But you aint been to it
cause I cant get into it
Unless I get out of it
An I gotta get out of it
Before I get into it
cause I never get into it
Unless I get out of it
An I gotta be out of it
To get myself into it

(she looked over at me with a glazed eye
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area
And she said...)

Just get me wasted
An youre half-way there
cause if my minds tore up
Then my body dont care

I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An said my-my-my
What sort of thing
Might this lady get high upon?

I checked out her sister
Who was holdin the bet
An wondered what kind of trip
The young lady was on

The forty dollar bill didnt matter no more
When her sister got nekkid an laid on the floor
She said dinah-moe might win the bet
But she could use a little ------- if I wasnt done yet

I told her...
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldnt give her a try

So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs in the air
An asked if she had any cooties on there

(whaddya mean cooties! no cooties on me!)

She was buns-up kneelin
Buns up!
I was wheelin an dealin
Wheelin an dealin an ooooh!
She surrended to the feelin
She sweetly surrendered
An she started in to squealin

Dinah-moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin an her face gone red
Some drool rollin down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered n quaked
An clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
bout her mental health
till dinah-moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline...

Kiss my aura...dora...
M-m-m...its real angora
Would yall like some more-a?
Right here on the flora?
An how bout you, fauna?
Ywanna?

Mmm...sound like ymight be chokin on somethin

Did you say you want some more?
Well, heres some more...

Mmm, sure...listen
Dyou think I could interest you
In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers?

Mmm...tweezers!
Here, lemme sterilize em...
Gimme your lighter...

I couldnt say where shes coming from,
But I just met a lady named dinah-moe humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you cant make me cum
(yjes cant do it)

I whipped off her bloomersn stiffened my thumb
An applied rotation on her sugar plum

I pokedn stroked till my wrist got numb
An you know I heard some dinah-moe humm,
Dinah-moe humm

)Kate (formerly Rockstar_100) is getting her technology on. The sky mirror is brilliant.

I dont get some of these jokes.

Today at the laundarette, I was sitting there watching my clothes spin in the washer, and this deaf guy with two speakers in each ear came in and started asking questions but with deaf-guy-slush-voice. He basically mumbled.. Then he started high tailing it out of there, and stuck his clenched up fist in the middle of the air in front of me. WE DID A Knuckle Bump!! It made me happy for ten minutes. Then I came back here and made this for Bob's Webpage.

Karen's moving out.

Hi.
So I've been here for a week.
1: It's hard to remember where I was before this. I know I was in Illinois, but it seems impossible.
2: My new sneaks are working out well, except for I walk 100 miles a day in them and my feets aren't used to the new shoes.
3: I've put off getting a bank account for a week. I should really go and get one.
4: Miki and I went an hour out into the suburbs of London to go to IKEA. I got a lamp shade, a new blanket, two plates, and a plant. She got all that stuff too except also a new mattress. The lamp shade has already melted to the bulb. Today the bulb went out so I've resorted to using a desk lamp to be able to see. Our rooms are 1/100 as depressing as they were when we walked into them for the first time.
5: We went to the Natural History Museum and the V&A.
6: Class starts tomorrow which will be good. I hope it's just not a room full of people and they yell at us where the library. I barely know where to show up and what time. Actually that's all i know but finding out that information was difficult as was it for Miki.
7: My summer assignment is done. I finished it in the last few days.. Started and finished it.
8: Steve Reich festival at Barbican until Oct. 8 including a world premier. Happy 70th.